Saturday 20 November 2010 – Thursday 2 December 2010
New Zealand (NZ) is literally a freak of nature. The country has one of the most varied and spectacular landscapes we have seen to date, ranging from snow-dusted mountains and drowned glacial valleys to lakes with turquoise waters on a backdrop of rolling hills. And given that it wasn’t even on our initial list of 28, it almost hurts us to say that this is probably our favourite destination so far.
Spanning 268,680 square km, NZ is actually bigger than the UK. It is also one of the few countries in the world with more sheep than people. For every Kiwi – and there are 4.4 million of them – there are 8 sheep to keep him or her company. Surprisingly even the sheep are outnumbered, this time by a small rodent called a possum, of which there are no less than 70 million on the island. As these possums tend to chew through millions on tonnes of foliage a year, they also happen to be the most hated animal in NZ and the national slogan is “Kill a possum, save a tree”. Fortunately the possum has a tendency to jump in front of speeding cars at nighttime, making the “bunny suicides” look like mere amateurs.
Christchurch (South Island)
We arrived in Christchurch around 02:00 in the morning on the last flight from Sydney. As only hours earlier a massive explosion had trapped 29 miners in the Pike River Mine just north of Greymouth, the plane was packed with TV crews from various Australian news agencies. In the days that followed it became clear that there was not going to be a repeat of the Chilean miracle as further explosions in the mine put an end to the last remaining hope of getting the trapped miners out alive. A real national tragedy, plunging the whole nation into grief.
Queenstown (South Island)
We got our first taste of the dramatic NZ scenery while driving our massive 4WD Toyota Highlander from Christchurch to Queenstown past the turquoise waters of Lake Tekapo and through towns with quant names such as Fairlie and Twizel.
Queenstown is the real deal though, a stunning place overlooking Lake Wakatipu with a cinematic background of snow-tipped mountains. More importantly, it is the self-proclaimed “Adventure Capital of the World”, and as such is basically a Disneyland for grown-ups. Bungee jumping, skydiving, jetboating, white water rafting, you name it they do it. This must be the best city in the world.
We kicked off our thrill seeking to do list in style. What better way to celebrate Emma’s birthday than by jumping out of a plane? We got those nice people at Nzone to toss us out of a perfectly fine airplane from 15,000 feet, making us scream like babies during the 60 seconds free fall (at 200 km per hour) before landing safely minutes later. A fantastic adrenaline boosting experience, at least with hindsight it was.
The next day we took a trip on a Shotover Jet through the rocky Shotover Canyons. These jetboats are basically speedboats on steroids as they attach a jet motor to the back of the boat. This means that a jetboat only needs as little as 10 cm of water to speed through the canyon. Our timing was spot on, as the previous day one of the guys had managed to crash his Shotover Jet into the canyon wall. The jetboat goes pretty quick and the 360 degree turns were very cool, but to be fair it doesn’t even get close to the skydive.
After that we got that bloke from AJ Hackett (yes the one that invented bungee jumping in the first place) to push me out of a small pod suspended over the Nevis River 134 meters below. I was a bit skeptical at first, especially when it became clear that the jumping sequence was determined on the basis of weight, which somehow meant that I was going to be the first to jump that morning. It felt a bit that the strategy was like “Let the fat guy jump first, if he hits the rocks we need to shorten the line”. It also has to be said that Emma – who chickened out herself – wasn’t being overly helpful when she felt the need to tell everyone after the jump “Yes, Fat Jesus can fly”. All in all a pretty awesome experience, but if I am honest, I would have to say that the skydive was definitely scarier as those 60 seconds freefall actually give you time to realise what is happening (well that would be, “I just stepped out of a plane, I am going 200 km per hour and the ground is approaching pretty quickly now”).
In between jumping off cliffs and out of planes we also managed to include some more relaxing experiences. We signed up for the “Ride of the Rings” on horseback with Glenorchy Dart Stables on two horses called “Boris” and “Harry”, galloping past some of the famous locations where Lord of the Rings was filmed. We also flew to Milford Sound for a day, taking the cruise through the fjord while spotting dolphins and being splashed by waterfalls. Emma, for some reason unclear to me, would like to point out that a naked Hugh Jackman jumped off one of these waterfalls for a scene in the movie “X-men Origins: Wolverine” (e.g. the one where he escapes from the laboratory).
We really loved Queenstown and special thanks is due to Sam & Guy for recommending the outstanding Queenstown Park Boutique Hotel, which we absolutely adored, and making sure we didn’t grow hungry by sending us to Fergburger for the best burgers in town. Fergburger’s slogan is “Ferg loves you” and they even have an official doctor’s note on the wall, confirming that somebody dislocated his jaw while eating Fergburger’s signature burger the “Big Al”. For what it is worth, our own culinary recommendations in Queenstown would be Wai at the pier, where we went for Emma’s birthday dinner and Pier 19, which was so good we actually went twice.
Franz Josef Glacier (South Island)
After 5 days of playing adrenaline junkies we left Queenstown behind and made our way over to Franz Josef Glacier on the West Coast of the South Island. This particular glacier was first explored by an Austrian fellow called Julius Haast and he named it after the Austrian emperor. We only spent one night in Franz Josef Village and as true tourists we walked all the way up to the terminal face to take our pictures before jumping back in our 4WD to start our drive up to Kaikoura on the North side of the South Island.
Kaikoura (South Island)
Until the 1980s, Kaikoura was a sleepy crayfishing town, but nowadays it is the whale-watching capital of NZ and it has an abundance of wildlife with whales, dolphins, seals and the occasional penguin stopping by on a regular basis. Taking no chances we went whale-watching on one of the boats of “Whale-Watch Kaikoura”. These guys have a success rate of 98% and even refund your ticket if they don’t manage to spot any whales. To be fair, they were pretty good and we are currently the proud owners of over 250 pictures of the tails of two massive sperm whales.
Kaikoura is a real picture-perfect peninsula town and there can’t be many places in the world which have snow-topped mountains that close to the sea. Of course we couldn’t help but dropping by the legendary “Kaikoura Seafood BBQ”, which is not much more than a roadside stall, but they make the best crayfish sandwiches in town.
Ohakune (North Island)
After eight days on the South Island we took the ferry to the North Island, first stop Ohakune, which, believe it or not, is NZ’s “carrot capital” (don’t ask). We found this amazing B&B called Manuka Lodge run by a guy from Brighton and his Kiwi wife. They also had a cat called Flaps, who was a legend in his own right. The brochure described him as follows:
“Flaps the cat. Please don’t be falsely lured by his cuddly façade. He is a ruthless, calculating miscreant, rumoured to be the evil mastermind behind the 2008 Great Furniture Laceration. Under no circumstances must he be left alone in the lounge, however slumberous his demeanor – chuck him outside into the night; he can get into the garage where he has a bed. Also be prepared for him jumping into any windows left open at night.”
As true amateurs we of course left our window open when we went to bed, only to be woken up in the middle of the night by the ruthless, calculating miscreant himself.
We got up early the next morning for the Tongariro Alpine Crossing, a full-day hike, and reportedly the best one-day walk in NZ, which traverses active volcanoes and beautifully coloured lakes. We also passed Mount Ngauruhoe, which Lord of the Ring enthusiast would probably recognise as Mount Doom. Peter Jackson used Tongariro National Park as the setting for The Land of Mordor in the Lord of the Rings trilogy.
Taupo (North Island)
After all the excitement of the previous days, we decided to opt for some chillaxing on the shores of NZ’s largest lake, Lake Taupo. The town of Taupo itself reminded us a bit of Flagstaff, Arizona, a small, slightly isolated but charming place. We spent two days in Taupo and the best part was being able to watch the sun set over the lake from the hot tub on our balcony, while sipping Chardonnay.
Wellington (North Island)
We ended our NZ adventures in the capital, Wellington. On our way down from Taupo, we passed the completely forgettable town of Palmerston North. John Cleese probably described it best when he said: “If you ever do want to kill yourself, but lack the courage, I think a visit to Palmerston North will do the trick”. In revenge, Palmerston North city council named a rubbish dump after the British comedian.
Wellington on the other hand is a nice city. It is a sort of smaller and sleepier version of San Francisco. We did manage to contribute to the local economy after getting a parking ticket for parking our car illegally outside the Ohtel hotel.
We spent two weeks in NZ and we can only admit that this is a truly fantastic country. Everything you read in the travel guides is true. NZ is definitely our favourite country so far.
Next stop: Discovering The Land of the Rising Sun: Japan
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