Destination #20: Checking out some stones in Petra (Jordan)

Wednesday 26 January 2011 - Sunday 6 February

Petra (Jordan)

"A quiet house in a noisy neighbourhood" is how Jordan's beloved late King Hussein called his country. And it feels like he wasn't far off.

A short flight from Abu Dhabi, on what could have been my personal airline - Royal Jordanian's RJ615 - got us to Amman. Royal Jordanian must be the most chaotic airline in the whole world. As the flight attendants didn't speak any Arabic one confused passenger almost opened the emergency exit door during take-off after he misunderstood the safety instructions.

From Amman we drove one of the largest rental cars to date - a GMC the size of a tank - over the Desert Highway all the way to Petra. The Desert Highway does exactly what it says on the tin, it is just a 240km long stretch through the desert, passing nothing but sand and the occasional lost camel.

 

The ancient Nabataean city of Petra however is an incredible site. It is sort of a mix of the grandeur of the Grand Canyon, combined with the steps of the Inca Trail and the ticket prices of Disneyland. We got ourselves an excellent guide named Hassan. Hassan, a father of six - "I try to control them, but to be honest it doesn't really work" - guided us through the ever narrowing Siq gorge, towards the Treasury (which featured in Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade as the final resting place of the Holy Grail), past the Place of High Sacrifice (according to Hassan so named because the climb up requires a "high personal sacrifice") and finally to the well-hidden Monastery.

In the evening we joined the "Petra by Night Tour" where candles lit up the path through the Siq all the way up to the Treasury. We have to admit that a visit to the Old City of Petra is a once in a lifetime experience. It is truly fascinating site and as far as we are concerned it is rightfully considered as one of the New Seven Wonders of the World.

We also made a desperate attempt to visit Lawrence of Arabia's Wadi Rum, but a lack of fuel and a surplus of rain got the better of us and we had to turn the tank around before we could actually make it there.

After spending a couple of days in Petra, and having managed to get food poisoning at the Moevenpick's "Fine Dining Restaurant" (seriously, you can't make this stuff up), Em drove the tank back over the Dead Sea Highway to Amman. I have to admit we have never seen this many military checkpoints and police controls in our life and we have been to Israel and South America. When we eventually did get stopped the conversation ended up being almost comical: "Where are you from?", "ehmm Holland", "Where are you going?, "ehmm Amman", "Oh welcome to Jordan then!".

Amman looked like a really nice city, but unfortunately we didn't do it justice as we only stayed one night before catching a RJ flight back to Sam & Guy in Abu Dhabi. Despite the fact that the King sacked the whole cabinet during our stay, and while protests crippled neighbouring country Egypt, there was never any sign of unrest in Jordan. A quiet house in a noisy neighbourhood after all then.

Abu Dhabi

One of the first things Guy did when we arrived in Abu Dhabi was to take us to the recently opened Ferrari theme park named "Ferrari World". The best ride here is without a doubt the Formula Rossa Rollercoaster. With 240km per hour, this hydraulically launched rollercoaster is the fastest rollercoaster in the world. It was so good we went twice and then another time. However, the other main ride, V12, which is as much as a boat ride through an enormous Ferrari engine, received our vote of "gayest ride in the universe".

What else did we get up to in Abu Dhabi? Well I almost was tempted in trying the Camelcino (Cappuccino with camel milk) at the fancy Emirates Palace, we also hired some crazy fast jet-skis at the harbour next to the Fishmarket (100 km per hour no probs), had some excellent ribs at The Meat Company in the Souq Qaryat Al Beri and met Beau and Max for some bellinis and a really nice Italian dinner at Cipriani at the Yas Yacht Club. I also got a Tunisian bloke called Mohammed to trim my beard Sheikh Khalifa style in Marina Mall. And to finish it all off, Em of course couldn't resist but hitting the local shoe and diamond shops.

Dubai

Dubai is where it all started to slightly unravel. It started innocently enough with a stroll through the Dubai Aquarium and a visit to the tallest man-made building in the world (828m): Burj Khalifa (it was supposed to be called Burj Dubai, but one of the conditions of the Dubai bail-out by big brother Abu Dhabi was that the tower was to be renamed to Abu Dhabi's ruler Sheikh Khalifa).

However when Sam and Em hit the shops for an 11-hour shopping bonanza, Guy and I made our way over to the desert to do some good old "dune bashing". And this is where things really came apart. The lesson I have learned here is that when somebody calls a sand-buggy "his baby" it is generally not a good idea to crash it. And crashing it is what we, or should I say I, did. It has to be said that Guy didn't help by shouting "faster, faster, faster' but going full speed over the top of a sand dune in the middle of the desert while you can't see what is on the other side of that sand dune is not one of the smartest thing I ever did. Especially when it later became clear there was a pretty steep drop on the other side of that sand dune. Let's just say we found out the hard way, having flipped the car and having found ourselves hanging upside down in it in the process. 

Despite our best efforts to sweep the whole thing under the carpet, there is not much you can say when both front wheels point in a different direction. We parted company with a wad of cash and the rental guy accepted the fact that "his baby" would never be the same again. One day this will be a great bedtime story, stuff of legends. Anyway where can you still crash a sand-buggy for the price of a pair of discounted Jimmy Choos?

Special thanks to Sam & Guy for being such fine hosts and of course to their "special needs cat" Buster and his occasionally grumpy sister Sparkles who lightened up our visit with non-stop entertainment and acrobatics. Thanks guys we had a great time in the desert!

Next stop: Destination #21: Havana (Cuba)

Destination #19: Chilling out in Copenhagen (Denmark)

Thursday 13 January 2011 - Sunday 16 January 2011

Short but sweet, was the theme of our, well, as Emma sat this one out, my first destination of 2011: Copenhagen.

Copenhagen has to be my favourite European city and that is despite the fact that my former Interim Global Co-Head of Northern European Coverage Freddy is running around causing havoc there. By the way our inspiring leadership campaign lasted no longer than a couple of days and they did have to sack the whole team for us to move up by default (it was not like there was anyone else left in the team "to manage"). Our short reign was brutally ended when the real management guys found out they forget two guys in the cull and moved us to some other team in order to do some actual work for a change.

Not only did our personal lifestyle guru and Wallpaper & Monocle founder Tyler Brûlé choose Copenhagen as "2nd most liveable city in the World for 2010" for the second year running, but also I bet you didn't know that the average police response time is just 3 minutes and 30 seconds (that is what happens if you spent too much time on airplanes, you start to store utterly useless facts).

Copenhagen used to be the place for copious amounts of gay drinks ("With an umbrella please. By the way do you happen to have a straw as well? Yes the pink one is fine") and stumbling out of nightclubs in the wee hours of the morning. Unfortunately I passed my peak a long time ago, the only sport I would currently qualify for is sumo wrestling and those small headaches in the morning after a night of heavy drinking now take days to clear. So, just like the old days, Freddy and I spent three mornings on the squash court. And just like the old days, I managed to lose each and every set. Nothing beats getting up early in the morning and getting your ass wipped three days in a row. Some things just never change. Well actually one thing did change, the lovely Marie, who must have lost her mind as she is actually living with Freddy, made us a killer breakfast every morning. Noma eat your heart out. After all that hard work, I have to admit that we did manage to squeeze in a couple of White Russians in a killer bar called Ruby as well.

Over the last couple of months we have done a lot of new adventurous and exciting things. But never before have I had to wear a more ridiculous outfit than when we went "hunting" in the forests outside Copenhagen that Saturday. As the puppy was still being groomed for the real thing, I was dressed up as a sort of disastrous outcome of a cloning experiment between Rambo and the Michelin Man gone pear-shaped. Furthermore, it still makes no sense to me why I was dressed up all in green, in a snow covered forest, where besides Freddy an me, there was nothing, and I do mean nothing, that actually slightly resembled the colour green. Good news of all this was that Bambi saw us coming from miles away and no animals were spotted or hurt in this disastrous hunting expedition.

As I made my way to the gate at CPH on Sunday evening, holding an "Energizer" from "Joe and the Juice" in one hand (great recommendation by Christian by the way) and my Tumi bag in the other, I could think of only one thing: Damn I love Copenhagen.

Special thanks is due to the stunning Marie (I still have difficulty sleeping after that ghost story you told me), the lovely Sofie, the crazy Pitou (aka Little Terror) and of course the main villain of the piece Freddy "Gay Drinks" Scheibel. Thanks guys, I had a blast.

Nest stop: Destination #20: Checking out some stones in Petra (Jordan)